Tuesday, August 26, 2008

LLTP: Part 4

Last week, my wonderful friend, Queen B, wrote this post that really hit home for me. It's something that has been on my mind almost constantly for the past 29 days and something I know didn't just happen into my mind.

I know God put it there.

And I know He had a lesson He wanted to teach me.

A lesson that I'm sure He has been trying to teach me for a long time...but I wasn't ready to listen or rather I was too stubborn to hear.

I'm not one to sit back and let life come as it can. I need to be in control. I need to have my foot on the gas and my foot on the brake and control everything that happens. I need to make lists; I need to be involved; I need to prioritize; I need to be in charge (or think I am).

But, God has shown me that what I've really been needing to realize is that being "still" and obeying His commands is where all my focus should be. And what better way to finally make me stop, shut up and listen.

I'm not saying that God wanted to cause me pain...He just needed to open my eyes to something He has been telling me all along.

We've been having a conversation similar to this for quite some time now.

But it's so hard, God.

But, Amy, I never said loving me and following me was going to be easy.

But, God, I have so much that I want to do.

What about me, God, what about me?

Amy, it's not your will, but the will of the Father that you need to be following.

But how, God?

And through all this pain, I was finally still...and heard it all.

Be still and really hear and God's direction will be revealed. Will I hear it every time from now on? Probably not, but I do have a better grasp on what I need to be searching for in my life...His will and only His will.

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